Survivalista: Stinky business

Although the ankle-deep puddle of piss I had to make my way through, so I could sqwat next to the white bare asian butts belonging to women doing their 'business', were all very welcoming, I decided my blather was not exploding after a 10 our train trip. I was perfectly fine. Zen. You have to draw the line somewhere. Right? After dangling above porcelain hell holes while trying to minimize the gag-reflexes, doing 'it' in a shack above some wooden planks with a crack between them and actually paying to go to a place where you couldn't lock piss-stall 1, number 2 had a fresh stinking pile of China shit lying right next to it, not in it, number 3 had no door at all and the last one, number 4, well... the blood bath in there indicated a girl with some serious menstrual problems was there before me.

In short: Chinese toilets are the worst. After visiting Laos, ranked one of the 20 poorest countries in the world, you'd think China, the secretly reigning super power, would be a delight for a blather in need. You see, China is beautiful. Absolutely stunningly gorgeous. And they know it. They got a little arrogant if I can just be honest with you for a second. It is the only country so far that I know of that lets you pay to take a picture of nature, asks 30 times the price for a beer in a restaurant than you pay in a super market and charges you for the horror they call 'restroom'.

I always see cleaning equipent at the entrance, but the fact that you can already smell the presence of a toilet while you are still 50 meters away from it, makes me think the moldy mop is just for show, to trick you into paying. The last 'restroom' I delightfully visited to find some relief had such a bad ammonia stench I was afraid it would eat away the flesh in my nose. I left cursing out the lady sitting in front. No money was given back to me, nor did she magicaly reach for the cleaning equipment, she probably didn't even understand me, but it was finaly the relieve I really needed.